Redemption

I was speaking with a friend a few months ago about my past mistakes, hurts, and lessons learned. I was sharing with her the importance I feel that shared experience has on the impacting of young lives. I was basically telling her how I feel like teenagers need to be educated not only on the effects of your choices on short term consequences, but also on the long term ones.
I gave my testimony at a ladies retreat for my old church in Illinois. I stood in front of ninety-five women and poured my garbage out before them and talked about the grace and forgiveness I have found on my disastrous path. It was empowering and I really wanted to put myself out there to help people. However, I would later come to realize that the retreat and my testimony was more healing for me than it could have probably ever been for anybody else. It truly freed me. The truth about my life was no longer hidden in the depths of my shame. I was encouraged, but this did not give me the fullfillment of my passion I was seeking to obtain. I knew that there had to be more.
After praying and searching my heart, I realized that my passion lies in the hearts of young broken teenagers. Girls that are either at a fork in the road and need to make a choice, or the ones that have already made the choice and are broken for it. I would love to help shape the life of a young girl toward the better, by allowing myself to be vulnerable before her. My mistakes are shameful and they are something that I have hidden for quite some time. But, I finally feel myself coming full circle. I want to tell my story to show teenagers that their choices can impact their lives more than they can ever comprehend. I want to lead them through my broken journey.
I also really want to be there for the young girl that has already made bad and hurtful choices and show her that it's never to late to change your lifestyle and choose purity. Too many times I think that teenage girls think that they are already tainted and they continue on down a path of self destruction and devastation.
A couple of weeks ago I was talking with a different friend about how I go about sharing my life with young people. I was asking him...where do I start? He is a youth pastor at a church in North Carolina. The timing was a coincedence. He was reading an article on teen pregnancy and had just spoken with one of the other youth leaders about their girls retreats.
He has connected me with these ladies and I am now working on the possibility of sharing my life with a large group of high school and junior high girls in february. I pray that these girls will be receptive towards what I have to say and that they will be able to see at least a small part of themselves in where I have come from. I feel as though the redemption of my CHOSEN tragedy has finally begun!!!